Watermelon Man
Dick Curless

We loaded all our melons in the wagon Monday evening
Day break Tuesday me and Pa was Springfield bound
Papa took along a great big gallon jug of white corn whiskey
To quench his thirst and wash the road dirt down

Halfway to Springfield we came to a place called Ruby's tavern
Papa said we'd better rest the mule a while
So I hitched Sam to a shade tree Papa grabbed a watermelon
And walked in the tavern with a great big smile

I stayed by the wagon waitin' and it sure got aggravating
When Pa staggered outside holdin' Ruby's hands
And when he gave her more watermelon
I heard miss Ruby tell him that he was her favorite watermelon man

Then we got back on the wagon and we headed out toward Springfield
Papa was singin' the Mean Mule Skinner Blues
Then we came upon a lady pickin' berries by the roadside
Papa said Old Sam hello mam how are you

Then he said my name is Dan ma'm and I'm a Watermelon man ma'm
Got melons to sell and would you care for a few
She said Well I might like some but tell me do you plug 'em
Pa winked at me and say indeed I do

I was just a boy of thirteen and nobody's fool by no means
I went hunt for some drinkin' water for me and Sam
And when I got back to the wagon Papa was laughin' and a braggin'
Of the women calling him Watermelon man

When we came to Johnson's Long Hill old Sam got kinda lazy
Pa said come here mule but Sam he'd refused
So he grabbed his black snake whip and brought it hard down on sam's hind side
and done another verse of the mean Mule Skinner Blues

We rolled into Springfield with Pa singin' and a yellin'
The sheriff met us there but Papa showed no fear
He said why hello sheriff grab yourself a watermelon
Like the big one that I gave your wife last year

The sheriff stood there slack jaw with Pa's words stuck in his craw
He grinned real big and shook my Father's hand
He said I like you're way of tradin' could I joined in your operating
And be your partner Watermelon man
Yeah everybody loved the Watermelon man